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Sportsfreak
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Location: New Zealand
Posts: 169
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| Posted: 27 October 2009 at 2:17pm | IP Logged
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In conjunction with Random House we are giving away 2 copies of the book.
To enter, simply tell us about your favourite sports / travel story. Cricket in India, rugby on the beach in Fiji, darts in a Yorkshire pub, drag-racing in Hamilton, teaching the locals how to dribble on Copacabana Beach; take your pick.
Entries close on Guy Fawkes day.
Edited by Sportsfreak on 27 October 2009 at 2:17pm
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ShortSillyMidOn
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| Posted: 27 October 2009 at 2:54pm | IP Logged
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Has to be Rugby in the centre of Celtic Football Country in Gourock in Scotland. I was part of a crew of New Zealand Navy types in Gourock to pick up the Navy's latest Survey ship. We were there for 5 months and with a departure date looming it was time to get a ships rugby team together and play a local side. The local University team couldn't make the numbers so hurredly a local soccer team was drafted in to play us at our Natural Game and their Unnatural game.
The half time score was 6 - 3 to them, and we had a sniff that we could outlast their superior fitness (there are a lot of pubs in and around Gourock) and eventually the soccer types ran out 27-3 winners. Yes a bloody thrashing but an enjoyable game and an even better piss up afterwards (Guiness of course).
Another game of note was another Navy game, this time versus the Prime Ministers selection in Tonga (Nukualofa) played on a field that had two blades of grass (and they were scared) and coral based. Tackling was fraught with the continual reminder of coral cuts and gashes. I know we lost that too, but everyone was too worried about the playing surface and not the score.
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Leg Break
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| Posted: 27 October 2009 at 4:23pm | IP Logged
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That game in Tonga sounds a bit masochistic...
As it happens, I’ve played cricket out the back of the Taj Mahal. And it was against kids too.
Pretty gritty surface; certainly took a bit of turn. Which was a shame really because I’d told the opposition I was a Hadlee and had the stutter start at the top of my run-up well sorted.
From what I’ve seen from browsing Bowling for India in the book shop it’s a good read.
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Biff McCool
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| Posted: 28 October 2009 at 7:19pm | IP Logged
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Mine was more viewing than participation, but I was in Sydney to watch the third day of the 1994 test (the one that Damien Martyn spent most of his career trying to forget).
The last day was rivetting. The other four were almost as exciting as watching paint dry.
The temperature was 43 degrees and the poor bastard "hosting" me chucked us straight in the sun next to the Members Stand. "No worries mate - trust me on this one" he said.
By lunch (approximately 9 schooners later) the sun had disappeared behind the Members Stand, and it was a perfect day.
At about 5.30pm we left the SCG with just under 30 schooners under my belt. Apparently I still hold the Australian Allcomers Record for the longest continuous stream of urine expelled on Anzac Parade in Peak Hour Traffic.
Good day.
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I'll take your word for it Biff because you are a broadcaster I truly respect and believe. (westie stylz)
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westie stylz
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| Posted: 29 October 2009 at 6:43pm | IP Logged
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Mine would involve forming an expat football team in Korea in 2004 (that is still going to this day - Anyang FC) and losing our first practice game to a middle school team which left our entire side unable to walk properly for days.
We then lost our second game to a team of orphans. I sh*t you not, they were from an actual orphange and all in their early to mid teens. God bless us for deliberately chucking that game to spread some joy in their lives (they hammered the f**k out of us, I guess they just wanted it more).
Our team was named after our local K-League team who we all supported and our kits were some of their original ones from years earlier. Naturally the team was relocated to Seoul in our first team leaving us nobody to support. So we just went to the pub earlier than usual on Saturdays.
We also came last in our division, with yours truly winning the golden boot with a stunning 3 goals, one of which was scored off my throat which I believe I've already proudly stated here before. In our second season I hit the post from outside the box with a superb deflected strike off my back as the keeper tried to clear the ball. Other highlights included marking the lines and box with flour because the pitches were bare dirt/dust and any paint markings would only last a day, hence there were none, and also that the games were played on Sundays when not a man in our team was anything other than (very) hungover. Fortunately every player in the league has a drinking 'problem' so it evened out.
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Prepaid
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| Posted: 30 October 2009 at 8:27am | IP Logged
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Played a season for the Hawaiian Harlequins in 1989 - Used to warm up in a guys back yard across the road from the ground at the same time the club would be filling a huge drum full of Buds for post-game consumption in the 35 degree plus heat.
Grounds were as hard as rock (with rocks) and most of the players built like a small block of flats.
When the ball got kicked to our fullback if he kicked for touch the opposition and crowd used to go completely ferile 'run it man' and when he ran it back 'kill him' was usually the call.
The ladies were quite friendly too (allegedly).
All great stuff.
Have a gander here.
Edited by Prepaid on 30 October 2009 at 8:30am
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Biff McCool
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"The Fiddler"
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| Posted: 31 October 2009 at 4:00pm | IP Logged
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Prepaid wrote (NB This may not be accurate, please check the original post):
| the club would be filling a huge drum full of Buds for post-game consumption |
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Surely anyone who admits drinking Buds should be disqualified on principle? 
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Saturday 8am to 10am on Kiwi FM
Akl 102.2FM, Wlg 102.1FM, Chc 102.5FM
I'll take your word for it Biff because you are a broadcaster I truly respect and believe. (westie stylz)
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Leg Break
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| Posted: 31 October 2009 at 4:19pm | IP Logged
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Bud seems perfectly in keeping with some of the people in the link though.
There's a theme coming through this thread about pitch quailty...
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Biff McCool
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| Posted: 31 October 2009 at 4:47pm | IP Logged
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Not to mention liver quality 
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Saturday 8am to 10am on Kiwi FM
Akl 102.2FM, Wlg 102.1FM, Chc 102.5FM
I'll take your word for it Biff because you are a broadcaster I truly respect and believe. (westie stylz)
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Green&GoldRugby
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| Posted: 02 November 2009 at 3:28am | IP Logged
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Back in 96 I played for London French RFC. We toured Israel one weekend, beating Tel Aviv, but then getting stuffed by the national side. (we'd expected to be playing a Seinfeld XV when a bunch of 6 foot 5 blonde Jaapies trotted out in 30 degree heat)
The following morning at 3am, I was sat at the bar of 'The Mash Bar' with my kiwi mate, Sparky. He was face down, breaking the tour rule of 'NO SLEEPING IN PUBLIC'. Accordingly, "the Judge" was pouring Tabasco sauce down Sparky's butt crack, and ensuring it was well rubbed in. Sparky was so sparko, he didn't even stir.
10 minutes later and I'm on the main road looking for a taxi for me and the comatose Sparky, having gone to the next door convenience store and bought some water.
At this moment the Mash Bar doors fling open and out bursts Sparky, running like a glowing ember was stuck in his date. He sees me with the 2L bottle of Evian, and barely breaks stride as he drops his daks, bends over in front, spreads his cheeks and shouts "Matty - SPRAY ME! SPRAY ME!"
All directly across the road from Tel Aviv police station.
Good times, good times.
Edited by Green&GoldRugby on 02 November 2009 at 11:17am
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Leg Break
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| Posted: 02 November 2009 at 12:26pm | IP Logged
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GG;
Did Sparky ever get you back?
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Green&GoldRugby
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| Posted: 02 November 2009 at 8:50pm | IP Logged
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To clarify - "The Judge" wasn't me. It was pure Kiwi on Kiwi justice as it happens. I was just there to pick up (or should I say, water down) the pieces.
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Zardoz
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| Posted: 03 November 2009 at 10:16am | IP Logged
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My life is relatively uncomplicated
I'm a pm person – I was going to say I'm a night man but to old farts like me that has a very different connotation.
Daily I wake up – often slowly – in that nice comfortable space that only a 20 year old bed can provide.
Mine is a large bed and because over the years I have generally slept alone – when you have company in bed why sleep? - and that comfortable space tends to be far from the “north/south” position bedmakers envision.
Upon waking I force open one eye, look at the clock, shut that eye purposely and wait for reality to hit.
Then starts the question/answer period; Why? What do I have to do that requires me to get up? Can I go back to sleep for one more hour? Is the bladder completely full?
Then, with answers formed along party lines off go the blankets and feet hit the floor, I pad to the bathroom, perform necessary actions and head to the kitchen.
That's the day's pleasures dealt with, now to face the world – after several cups of the gods-given coffee of course – and my eyes start to open.
I loath travel!
You wake up in a strange bed, (“in” being questionable), feet already out of bed, hopefully alone (the stomach still turns with some memories of when that hope was not fulfilled) and, after ten minutes of figuring out where you are (and why you're there) the hangover hits.
Just what did you drink last night? – hint; The several empty Jaegermeister shot glasses, beer stubbies and the half filled whiskey bottle might give you an idea.
Then, you have to think where the bathroom is and pry open the eyes to find where to go once in there, find the jug and “coffee” equipment, force open the “coffee” sachets, scrape the “coffee” off the table into a cup, get the newspaper from outside the door, put pants on then go for the paper once more, spread it out to read, find reading glasses you last used while signing for room-service about midnight, straigten glasses, try to read a strange 'paper, wipe up the spilt coffee, and then look at the clock and realise not much is open at 05:30.
Coffee is of the floor sweepings variety and if you're in the type of hotel I normally stay at which floor they swept for it is worrying.
The day ahead is already planned; try and stay sober until lunch time, meet people, give up trying to stay sober, make a fool of yourself, pick up a whore ….. Whoops, I mean have dinner alone, consume that second bottle of red, order more Jaegermeister, beer etc.
Go back to that christ-awful bed.
Start all over again.
And then you go home and lie about the great time you had.
As I stated my life is relatively uncomplicated.
I could have written of a travelling experience.
It would have read “Travelled to (place Australsian destination here), got (very) drunk.
Spent time wishing you were here (and I wasn't).
Went home again.
I loath travel!
The only thing good about it is reading of others misfortunes while doing it.
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Some spread happiness wherever they go, others whenever they go.
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ShortSillyMidOn
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| Posted: 03 November 2009 at 11:38am | IP Logged
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Zardoz wrote (NB This may not be accurate, please check the original post):
My life is relatively uncomplicated
I'm a pm person – I was going to say I'm a night man but to old farts like me that has a very different connotation.
Daily I wake up – often slowly – in that nice comfortable space that only a 20 year old bed can provide.
Mine is a large bed and because over the years I have generally slept alone – when you have company in bed why sleep? - and that comfortable space tends to be far from the “north/south” position bedmakers envision.
Upon waking I force open one eye, look at the clock, shut that eye purposely and wait for reality to hit.
Then starts the question/answer period; Why? What do I have to do that requires me to get up? Can I go back to sleep for one more hour? Is the bladder completely full?
Then, with answers formed along party lines off go the blankets and feet hit the floor, I pad to the bathroom, perform necessary actions and head to the kitchen.
That's the day's pleasures dealt with, now to face the world – after several cups of the gods-given coffee of course – and my eyes start to open.
I loath travel!
You wake up in a strange bed, (“in” being questionable), feet already out of bed, hopefully alone (the stomach still turns with some memories of when that hope was not fulfilled) and, after ten minutes of figuring out where you are (and why you're there) the hangover hits.
Just what did you drink last night? – hint; The several empty Jaegermeister shot glasses, beer stubbies and the half filled whiskey bottle might give you an idea.
Then, you have to think where the bathroom is and pry open the eyes to find where to go once in there, find the jug and “coffee” equipment, force open the “coffee” sachets, scrape the “coffee” off the table into a cup, get the newspaper from outside the door, put pants on then go for the paper once more, spread it out to read, find reading glasses you last used while signing for room-service about midnight, straigten glasses, try to read a strange 'paper, wipe up the spilt coffee, and then look at the clock and realise not much is open at 05:30.
Coffee is of the floor sweepings variety and if you're in the type of hotel I normally stay at which floor they swept for it is worrying.
The day ahead is already planned; try and stay sober until lunch time, meet people, give up trying to stay sober, make a fool of yourself, pick up a whore ….. Whoops, I mean have dinner alone, consume that second bottle of red, order more Jaegermeister, beer etc.
Go back to that christ-awful bed.
Start all over again.
And then you go home and lie about the great time you had.
As I stated my life is relatively uncomplicated.
I could have written of a travelling experience.
It would have read “Travelled to (place Australsian destination here), got (very) drunk.
Spent time wishing you were here (and I wasn't).
Went home again.
I loath travel!
The only thing good about it is reading of others misfortunes while doing it. |
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Could have sworn I was reading Sonny Shaw's biography, lol.
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Prepaid
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| Posted: 03 November 2009 at 11:47am | IP Logged
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Ladies & Gentlemen we have a winner. Send him the book.
Edited by Sportsfreak on 03 November 2009 at 12:05pm
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Biff McCool
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"The Fiddler"
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| Posted: 03 November 2009 at 9:47pm | IP Logged
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Prepaid wrote (NB This may not be accurate, please check the original post):
| Ladies & Gentlemen we have a winner. Send him the book. |
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Yep - he's got my vote too.
__________________
State of Play
Saturday 8am to 10am on Kiwi FM
Akl 102.2FM, Wlg 102.1FM, Chc 102.5FM
I'll take your word for it Biff because you are a broadcaster I truly respect and believe. (westie stylz)
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Bowling through India GIVEAWAY
