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Read how we all saw the limited overs leg of the tour only a week ago. It seemed so promising; most people thought NZ was going to win the majority of the games, Mills was going to take wickets, and Owais Shah and hitting sixes were not linked. With the benefit of hindsight, England were always going to be the likely winners at Old Trafford. When you have some strange Texan with delusions of world domination waving money around, the English are famous for following blindly. So the Coalition of the Willing outclassed New Zealand easily. That made it 7 defeats in a row in the Future Form of the Game for the semi-finalists at last year’s World Championships, but there was confidence that they would be able to re-exert some authority in the middle form. That was a forlorn hope. New Zealand entered the first match with probably their most unbalanced team of all time. Their wicket-keeper, normally the fulcrum of the fielding effort was banished to the boundary, a totally out of sorts James Marshall batted at first drop, and the normal strength, numbers 6 and 7 had a total of 10 ODI runs between them. To make matters worse, Styris was the specialist 5th bowler; the only cover for him being Taylor’s loops leg-side full-tosses. Ad from the moment Mills had Bell caught off one of the biggest no-balls ever seen in the professional age, the writing was on the wall. By the time KP started showing off that his allegiance to right-hand batting was as solid as his allegiance to South Africa, that was the icing on the cake. So to Birmingham for the much anticipated second match; so anticipated that we decided to provide OBO commentary which, in the morning, looks about as flat as the match itself.
Here is the alternative commentary. Rain, more rain, a bit of cricket, rain, some bad light, some more cricket, a long lunch (they must have been starving) some more cricket, more rain, a bit of Duckworth Lewis, some more cricket, a gentleman’s agreement that play would continue until it was an official match, and then they call it off with just 6 balls needed to make a match of it. 50 over cricket can not buy a trick at the moment, and when you get Ian Smith preaching on how the lunch break was too long, you know they didn’t get it right. It was a low scoring week, which is to be expected when Collingwood and Elliott are the 2 leading wicket-takers. The tippers were much more successful in picking KP and Prince Brendan to be the top run scorers, although most got it the wrong way around. And having Oram missing from the week “he was so looking forward to” did not help either. Disturbingly, the English tippers top the leaderboard. Every week they send in their over-confident, patronising tips, and every week they come through. Miss Field has joined them in the leading group, but they have opened a bit of a lead. Special mention must go to the Mike on Cricket couple. They showed admirable bad sportsmanship in not blogging for a week due to the disastrous results, but still managed to turn in their best week, in contrast to their previous dismal efforts.. 5 tippers, including ourselves, managed the clean sweep of failures. So now the cap is shared between the 2 Englishmen. No further comment needed.. Results 1. Black Friday 20/20. Result. So much optimism for New Zealand, but not a shot fired. The semi-finalists in last year’s 20/20 World Championship; the event that changed the world have now lost 7 on the trot. That hurts, and what makes it worse is that the only people to get this right were the two UK tippers; King Cricket and Republique Cricket. 2. Most runs scored in BF2020. Adding to the pain, New Zealand even managed the unthinkable by playing Ian Bell into form. The old, familiar 12 year old spring in the step was back, as he played himself into the Stanford Show. Thankfully, no-one predicted this. 3. 1st ODI at Chester-le-Street (what kind of appalling Franglais is that?): Result The self-confident juggernaut was now fully in swing. New Zealand were deluded enough to think that they could get away with only 4 bowlers (one on debut) and Styris, and that the best keeper in the world should play as a batsman only. KP and co showed off on their new tricks, the tourists’ chins dropped and there were lots of 20s and 30s The normal suspects got this, along with Ben from MoC, Beer and Sport and, unusually, Miss Field. 4. Most runs in ODI1 Ah yes, Kevin Pietersen, with the much heralded first century since the World Cup. Breaking the long drought. Interestingly, only one New Zealander, Jamie How, has scored an ODI century since the World Cup. But that it not what this innings will be remembered for. Instead it will be for the two sixes he hit left handed and the subsequent fear, from ex-bowlers mainly, that the world was coming to an end. But lets get some perspective here; he is a single-figure handicapper at gold playing left-handed, he was well set, and the bowler was Scott Styris. This is not a revolution. Breaking the English stranglehold momentarily, Miss Field, and the Mike on Cricket double got the points here. 5. Most wickets in OD
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